The tidewater goby
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The other day I got an “only in California” email from the Malibu Triathlon:
This year’s heavy rain in Malibu has led to flooding of the Zuma Underpass, which has been a key part of our bike course. We also learned in late-August that an endangered species, the Tidewater Goby, has taken up residence in the water. This means that the water cannot be cleared or bridged as has been done in past years, and this has forced us to redesign the course within the last three weeks.
The Los Angeles Times reports that state wildlife officials directed the county agency in charge of the underpass not to disturb the goby (which is a fish). But they apparently didn’t tell the triathlon, or the city, about the issue until it was too late to grant the city permit for the new bike route, reduced from its 25-mile spree along some of the most exalted American coastline to a much shorter but still dispiriting quadruple loop around the parking lot; Malibu requires 32 days’ notice of the course, and two guardians of the republic on the planning commission have no intention of ceding a point of law.
All of this will come to a head tonight (as I write this on Monday) in a last-ditch appeal to Malibu’s city council. Some comfort lies in knowing that few population groups could exceed destination triathletes for sense of entitlement. (One participant lamented that racers stand to have prepared in vain, “from buying stuff to getting personal training.”) There will be Kendalls, and they will not observe the time limits on the mic. On the other hand, people who own real estate along the Pacific Coast Highway are not unused to getting their way. So we’ll see.
Two years ago, when I was doing this all for the first time, it would have really bummed me out to face the prospect of missing my race. But this will be Triathlon No. 4 just of the year, if it happens, and we have bigger fish to fry. Now, look: I happen to think environmental protection is an appropriate function of government. But if anything endangered shows up in Lake Placid between now and next July, I’m eating it.
I’m super close to qualifying for the New York City Marathon on Nov. 5 as a charity fundraiser. Please make a donation to the nonprofit Achilles International.